How to find yourself and your calling (+ personal experience)
“Sometimes we don’t even notice that our dreams come true.” (Omar Khayyam)
Most people prefer to go with the flow. School, university, work. For some, status in society is important; for others, money. But how many realize that it is not necessary to play a role in someone’s scenario. You can create your own. If you live your life according to your scenario, then you are desperately doomed to success.
If it’s still hard for you to understand yourself and find out what you really would like to do in life, then this article is for you. Here I will share some tools that will help you in finding yourself.
1. Dig in yourself.
Take some time to answer a few questions. Take a pen and paper. This is a must, as thoughts on paper are more specific. Answer the questions as honestly as possible, you write it only for yourself, and to deceive yourself does not make the slightest sense. Answer as you see fit. Write everything that comes to mind. As detailed as possible.
So here are the questions themselves:
- What do I like about myself?
- What do others like about me?
- What do I like to study / do in my free time?
- What would I do if I didn’t have to worry about money?
- What would I do if I knew for sure that everything would work out?
- What would I do if all of humanity died out and I would be left alone in the world?
- What things inspire / motivate me?
2. Set priorities.
What is really important to you for happiness from the material and non-material sphere? In order to make it easier to understand, I suggest not to put the pen with the paper aside and perform the following exercise:
1. Write 10-20 points about how you see your life after 5 years. At your request, you can also prescribe the same 10-20 points for life after 10 years.
As in the previous exercise, write absolutely everything that comes to mind.
For example, I wrote to myself that after 5 years I want to be married to a worthy man, have a child, ride my scooter, have a home in a country where it is always warm and cultural, jump 5 times with a parachute, make a magic tattoo Sak Yant in Cambodia. In general, write ABSOLUTELY ALL THAT COMES TO THE HEAD.
2. Now visualize each of these items. This can be done in meditation, or just imagine. Let's say the first item you should have is a luxury home. Imagine that you already have it, how you walk on it, touch furniture. Focus on how you feel: how strong emotions you feel, how happy you are at that moment.
!!! It is important to represent everything from the first person perspective, NOT by an outside observer !!! You can read more about this technique called “slides” in the book by Vadim Zeland
“Transerfing reality: The rustle of morning stars. Stage 23. Write down the sensations of each item in the notebook and at the end, indicate your priorities.
3. Remember your childhood.
When we were small, society and the external environment as a whole did not yet have a strong influence on us. Therefore, we more accurately had an idea of what we like and what not. In childhood, we also did not have time to become disappointed in life, so the boundaries of the inaccessible for us did not exist.
Remember what you liked doing in childhood, what you wanted to become, what you dreamed about.
A bit of personal experience
I recently found my notes where I answered all these questions. They made me smile, since they are all directly related to my adult life. Although at the time of writing, I was not aware of this
1. In the first paragraph, I wrote that I wanted to become a journalist, that I loved to write fairy tales and poems, I liked to play a television reporter. I really wanted this very much from the moment I remember myself and up to the 10th grade, until under the pressure of society I began to look for some more “prestigious” and “marketable” profession.
As you can see, by the age of 25, I fortunately managed to return to what I liked so much throughout my childhood. Thank you very much to this blog, and in particular to you, International Business Consulting, for your help and motivation.
2. The second point I prescribed excellence in physical education. Since childhood, I was quite strong and athletic, I was easily given all sports disciplines, with the exception of team games (volleyball, basketball).
Everything here also coincides. During the last years of schooling, I wanted to enter the Ministry of Internal Affairs and work at customs control. I really liked the very idea of the barracks regime, a kind of female army.
During my studies at the university, I worked very hard in the gym, got a personal trainer license, and worked in this area for several years. Notice, I unknowingly chose a sport where there is no team play. At the moment I am more interested in yoga, but anyway, sport is a part of my life to this day.
3. In the third paragraph, I wrote that I loved to sing. My father had a beautiful, strong voice. He sang always and everywhere. So, given that I had data for singing, I followed his footsteps in this regard.
For me, singing has always been and remains the best antidepressant. I love karaoke! I like to sing both for myself and for others. I do not exclude the possibility that in the future circumstances will be such that I will perform jazz for the public as a profession.
4. The last point is self-knowledge. All my childhood I was disturbed by such philosophical questions as “Who am I?”, “Why am I in this world? What is the meaning of my existence? ”,“ What awaits me after death? ”. I also wrote articles on this topic when I was a little girl, trying to somehow answer myself questions that do not torment me.
These questions have always remained with me. And I still FOUND them answers for myself. Largely with the help of people who I met in my life, dharmic teachings, and now meditation.
Conclusion
I always like to cite the following allegory as an example. Imagine what God comes to you and asks what you want. Imagine that he is really ready to fulfill your every desire. And you answer him, “I want to have a lot of money,” “I want to be happy.” But only YOU can know what you really want. God does not understand what “much money” or “happiness” is. Therefore, wanting to fulfill your desire, given the fact that it did not contain any specifics, you get a lot of money in the form of 20 dollars and happiness in the form of a free chocolate cake from friends.
Do not rush to extremes, but be a little bolder and try, try, try! Live your script! As Andrei Makarevich sang in his song, “you should not bend to the changing world - let it be better to bend under us.”
No need to spend days tormenting yourself with questions about your calling. Just a little awareness and understanding of what you really want is enough, and life itself will direct and help you.
If something stubbornly doesn’t work out for you, go through the points in this article again and consider whether this is really what you really want.
"Life is smarter than living." (Vera Polozkova)